Extremely Secret Email Club

There are 2 types of secrets. One you desperately want to keep inside, and one you cannot stop running your sweet mouth about.

This is the second type 👄

Every season, I scoop 12 fresh secrets out of my cranial chamber and secrete them into 12 very cool emails.

Sometimes they're funny, sometimes they're f*cked up. I can’t guarantee a theme. I can guarantee they’re better than Laura Belgray’s emails. I'm poorer than her, so my branding isn’t as polished, but my stories don’t suck, and that’s where you win.

3 reasons not to sign up for Extremely Secret Email Club

Too many members already

The smaller the club, the more cliquey and obnoxious we can be.

If you’ve found your way here, I guess you can join, but please don’t tell anyone else. I’m already writing to 326 people and it’s a bit much tbh.

73.7% of my emails are rude

The King offered me 11 million pounds to stop writing these emails, and I told him to get f*cked.

If you’re sensitive to the odd sh*t-bomb and like it when people start their emails with ‘hello’, I’m not your people.

You’ll stop writing meh-mail

Unfortunately, your writing will improve with every email you read. Each email is pre-loaded with military-grade, stealth-mode copywriting lessons.

You’ll be so gripped by my words you won’t even realise you’re being secretly indoctrinated by me.

“I was moved to start Extremely Secret Email Club when I realised how under-served the ‘mysterious email list’ market was.

People were crying out for a subscription devoted to black-box secrecy and deeply personal business bits, and I knew I could deliver both.”

- Nadia Amer, CSO

We’re just a group of like-minded secret-keepers, obsessed with keeping secrets and learning about marketing, copywriting, sales, and all the other MI5 sh*t I do at home.

What’s in it for you

🤩 Audio available in every email because who reads?!

🤩Free copywriting lessons course makers hate me cos I’m giving away their paid lessons for free. I’ve even heard there’s a bounty on my head (no, not the delicious chocolate coconut kind) for my capture

🤩True grit I’m a hot mess and I want you to know about it. I share all the uncomfortable growing I do as I build my business

🤩No repeat content you know those people who paste Instagram posts into emails? NEVER that

🤩Funny stuff I’m a comedian and it really comes through in my emails

🤩You’ll probably rewrite your emails after my welcome sequence most people do. And they tell me it’s because my emails made them realise they can “be themselves” and get actual replies from their list

🤩Plagiarisable lots of people copy my content, and that means I’m excellent at my job. People who lift my copy get a public bollocking so probs don’t do this

🤩Unexpected stuff happens. Sometimes I’ll ask you to press buttons you’re apprehensive about. People who trust me are rewarded (with more FREE lessons usually)

🤩Bonus bits: when I launch a new service, open up slots for bookings, drop a dope e-book or take a 6-week long holiday, you’ll be the first to know and benefit

mermaid at the bottom of the ocean watching netflix on a laptop

Rarer than a Birkin handbag 👜

Like an extremely thrilling Netflix show made of words, I only send out 12 emails a season.

Then I take a nice long break to hunt for salacious secrets and scurry back to you (on all fours) with fresh kills (stories) hanging out my mouth. Essentially, I’m a feral fox with internet access and opposable thumbs.

Season 4 starts on Friday 19th April 2024.

Why you gotta be Extremely Secret though?

People love secrets.

To feel like they’ve been let in on something nobody else knows.

The kiss of a whisper in an ear.

A scribbled note folded into a sweaty palm and passed under a desk during class.

The intoxicating ‘ping’ of what-happened-last-night notifications on WhatsApp.

We love the rush of a good secret.

And the greatest triumphs and tragedies in history have often relied on our ability to keep secrets and the way they spill out of us when we least expect them too.

But nowhere else in our world is secrecy exploited more than in the advertising we consume.

Secret recipes. Secret formulas. Secret societies. Secret steps. Secret programs. Secret weapons...Victoria’s Secret! Like. what the hell is it, Victoria? What are you hiding?

Please don’t say good underwear.

Cos I don’t believe it.

So I’m reclaiming secrecy for what it should be.

And actually sharing my personal stories with you.

Things I really wouldn’t share in public.

Stuff I only really feel comfortable sharing because, in the warmth of your inbox, it’s just me and you. Hanging out. Reflecting on all the weird, woeful, and wonderful things that have happened since I’ve started working.

Oh, and I live for the drama. So, there’s that too.

Things members may or may not have said

“Your writing is a treat to read every week. Please keep doing it, even when on your sick bed.” - 🥸

“Just a thank you for the wonderful copy! They are always a highlight of my Fridays” - 🥸

“Just wanted to say thanks. Your advice and just reading your words have given my emails to my subscribers a massive overhaul…” - 🥸